A fiery fun spat of blind items pertaining to the comedy world emerged in the weeklies over the past couple days. We've filtered them out and added a few of our own to the mix. If you're eating Dipping Dots right now, put them down, because if you accidentally spill them all over the blind item braille below, you're just gonna get confused and sticky.

FROM:
1) "Humor is often relegated to dank basements where stand-ups perform for a bunch of social miscreants. Not at this showcase, which manages to treat comedy like an art form, keep drink prices super low and pay performers like professionals. Laugh, then learn about the Children's Aid Society on your way out."

FROM:
2) "Which still-not-out funnyman known for that sitcom has a gigantic trouser pipe that you'd think wouldn't even fit in a closet?"

3) "Which zany comic who's always been weird looking--and later became weird looking in a different way--was spotted with a surprisingly hot guy in a gay bar in Brazil?"

FROM: The Apiary:
4) Which relatively new-to-NYC comedy wunderkind is already packing the proverbial lollerblades for the piers of Santa Monica?

5) Who's the area funnylady who was sighted this morning dropping off her pet at the vet for a good old fashioned neutering?

6) Which writer, who's best known for despising the world around us, seems surprisingly sugary sweet in person? (Hint: It's not Hitchens.)