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Entries in Michael Jackson RIP (1)


5 Inopportune Times to Find Out About the Death of Michael Jackson

Where were YOU when you first heard that Michael Jackson died? Many of us will mistily recall to our children some day: "So I was collating documents at work this one time and then this dude I barely know texted me and was all 'Michael Jackson is ded! :(' and so I went to TMZ and yup, there it was. And then I guess I felt sadness or something. Who knows!"

As arresting as that moment was to you, here are 5 unfortunate situations to be in when learning that Michael Jackson has died.

1. While you're at an awesome foam party.Even the bubbles would remind you of Michael's chimpanzee. Party over!

2. After you've slipped into a Jesus Juice-induced blackout.

A lost opportunity for both Michael and your assembly of legal sharks.

3. When your company softball team is counting on you to hit the freakin ball and get on base for once in your life.

I know this news is hard to deal with, but swing like you mean it!

4. While simultaneously hearing for the first time that a man walked on the moon and JFK got assassinated.

I would lose my shit.

5. After learning all the dance moves for the This Is It tour.

What a waste of time!