Another 2011 State of the Union Drinking Game

By: Danny Tuss

Everyone loves a good drinking game. Except for people struggling with alcohol addiction, I suppose. So here's The BEST 2011 State of the Union Drinking Game. (I added the word 'best' here for search engine optimization.)

1 drink of beer:

Mention of any of these words:

Jobs

Economy

Bipartisan

Anal 

"Let me be clear"

2 drinks of beer:

Republican caucus bursts into applause

Republican caucus bursts into flames

Waterfall until the camera pans away:

Any shot of Michelle Obama's righteous arms

Whenever they show that photo of Elena Kagan playing softball

1 shot:

A Congressman is snoring loudly

If Obama accidentally calls John Boehner, Mr. Boner

Mentions of lessons learned from Tuscon shooting (we didn't learn anything!)

Finish the bottle:

Gabrielle Giffords rides in on a Jazzy Power Chair

Bo Obama poops anywhere other than a congressional wee-wee pad

Someone throws a shoe