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Wednesday
Jul072010

4 Shirts I Left Behind on the Rack While Vacationing in The South

The beaches of South Carolina are great for one thing only: getting a luxe and leathery tan. If you want shopping though, save your money for Marshall Field's when you get home--the t-shirts I encountered there on vacation were JUST TOO IRONIC for my sophisticated urban look. Here are 4 of them I briefly considered buying before deciding the money would be better spent on slushies at Sonic.

I didn't know deer camp was a thing. And I also didn't know it was a place where young men have their first male-to-male-to-female three way.

Who would waste these items fishing when you need them all to cook meth?

I can appreciate the ingenuity and hell-or-highwater spirit of rednecks, but in order to wear this shirt, I'd need to believe that a carelessly revealing buttcrack is a symbol of my deep cultural pride. Grammy award winning vocalist Whitney Houston said it best: "Crack is wack."

This would be better if the dude was shooting a Domino's pizza or a pint of Hunan chicken.

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