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May 30, 2006
Deadly Bees Seize Park Slope Restaurant
The following events occurred Saturday, May 27th--a day that will forever sear the memories of those involved.
It started as just another bright, sunny day in Park Slope, Brooklyn...
When tragedy struck!
Local brunch hotspot, Sotto Voce, turns into a local brunch nightmare.
Thousands of angry and deadly bees attack the restaurant for no good reason. Outdoor patrons scramble for cover. Gawkers flock to every corner of the block to get a close (but not too close) look at the madness.
A passing Highlander tries to intimidate the bees with a menacing glare. A dozen or more people remain trapped inside the restaurant, nervously eating their risotto. There is no way out, except for the back door.
Police officers decide on a plan: "Should we shoot the bees? Or should we slam our patrol cars into them?"
"I've had it with these motherfucking bees on this motherfucking door!" the owner of the restaurant probably said, as he raced to the scene with a can of bug spray.
And then it was over. In respect for the bees who gave their lives on this Memorial Day weekend, The Apiary refuses to publish any further pictures on the matter.
Posted by The Apiary at May 30, 2006 10:40 AM
Comments
I gotta say, Improv Everywhere is really getting complicated with their stunts.
Posted by: erik Marcisak at May 30, 2006 11:39 AM
Park Slope used to be a proud neighborhood for Africanized Killer Bees, but as you can see, gentrification effects everyone.
Posted by: Neighbor Hoodie at May 30, 2006 12:00 PM
See what happens when you don't have an exit strategy?
Posted by: Anthony at May 30, 2006 12:49 PM
Some soapy water would have done the trick. Ok, I concede that delivery of the soaped water would have been tricky. Perhaps a bus boy could have used a turkey baster?
This would have spared the police the dilemma of whether or not to shoot the bees; and the owner from spraying chemicals all over his doorway.
Here I thought Slopians were environmentally thoughtful.
Posted by: Retired Chef at May 30, 2006 1:17 PM
I would like to try Sotto Voce. There is a lot of buzz surrounding that place.
Posted by: matt at May 30, 2006 1:32 PM
"Here I thought Slopians were environmentally thoughtful."
They are. Back when neighbors had issues with the Blah Blah Restaurant/Lounge on 11th Street they toss free-range brown eggs on the place's back deck! Now that's classy.
Posted by: Jack at May 30, 2006 2:15 PM
those bees were just in it for the all you can drink brunches that make sotto voce rock (note: it's been 2 years since I did brunch there so I can't say that the unlimited booze still holds)
Posted by: roos at May 30, 2006 6:23 PM
I LIKEY BOTTY!!!
Posted by: anonymous at May 31, 2006 7:22 AM
Oh, it does--$12 for entree with unlimited bread, poundcake and mimosas or bloody marys. Best deal in town!
Though, you know, not with all those bees there.
Posted by: kslope at May 31, 2006 10:55 AM
Sotto Voce has the worst brunch ever. I hope the kitchen is attacked by bees so they are unable to serve that poor excuse they call "food" ever again. How do you f*uck up eggs? Really.
Posted by: kizzle at September 23, 2006 10:37 AM
Nice: advocate the stinging of people over eggs..
Kslope: How do you F*ck up sensoring yourself?.. d*ick
Posted by: Syntax at February 5, 2007 10:46 PM